Today the world ended in London for a brief spell as thick fog seeped and spread to the windows and the sky was dark as night and rain poured and you couldn’t see beyond your own nose through the glass.

I have nothing important to say.

More blood taken and they think I may be B12 deficient. This would explain a lot of things, among them:

Depression
Anxiety
Skin rashes
Chronic fatigue
Irritability
Crying spells
Mild paranoia
The constant sense that something bad is happening
Thoughts of death

It would be very strange if I discovered that my worst characteristics were only symptomatic of a deficiency that could be eradicated by a vitamin supplement. It makes you shiver (or breathe a sigh of relief, if you’re Bruce). Though I don’t honestly believe a vitamin supplement is going to make mortality any less obvious to me.

Work kind of sucks right now – my only friend here seems to hate it when I make a plan to better my circumstances and actually tries to discourage me from taking action. So far, it would be better to never move from our rented one-bedroom flat (too far from work, too expensive!), have a child (too expensive, no time for friends!) or take banjo lessons in Islington (too expensive, too far to travel!). I think I might shake a packet of B12 vitamins on her head and see what that accomplishes.

Otherwise, I’m in a near-constant state of confusion about what I’m supposed to be doing and have been slowly building a weekly schedule that appears to be designed for someone making a lot more money than I do. Except that it’s definitely my work in that schedule. I plan to schedule in a meltdown somewhere close to October as I think I might have an opening.

Bruce may be unhappy to know that I’m still signing my contract, which will bind me to this place until at least September 12th. But you can’t beat the hours or location (or pay, really) and the 10% of time that things are good here, they’re really good and I like nearly everyone.

And there’s always the B12. Possibly I’m in my dream job and I don’t even realise it!

I’m a bit concerned about how the B12 could affect my relationship with Bruce, as even now I love him with a ferocity that makes me feel vaguely unwell.

Amy’s coming so very soon and there are things to think of, like cleaning and putting up curtains and trying to book a bit of time off so we have longer than a weekend to spend together. My parents are definitely moving to Vancouver, so the rest of you will have to come to me from now on I’m afraid. Or, you know. There’s always email I guess.

Yeah, I got nothing for you, soz.